The events that followed today marked a tragic day for me. DISCRETION: This post is not for the faint of heart; be prepared to shed some tears on my behalf if you aren’t mentally strong.
I had four exams in school today. The scheduled time of the tests were as followed: Macroeconomics at 9:00am, Global Geography (Geog) at 10:30am, International Relations (IR) at 12:00pm, and Probability/Statistics (Stats) at 2:00pm.
And so the tragedy begins…
I finished my Macroeconomics test and walked to my Geog class. As my professor was rambling on about stuff, I opened my backpack to take out my Stats notebook to study a bit. No notebook was present. I left it at home. I thought, “If I finish the Geog test early, I’ll drive home, pick up the Stats notebook, and drive back right on time for my IR test. After I finish my IR test, I could then calmly study for my Stats test.”
I finished the Geog test at exactly 11:20pm. “Great!” I thought, “I have forty minutes to walk to my car, drive home, grab the Stats notebook, and come back to take the IR exam.” Just a reminder: I am an extremely intelligent once-in-a-generation-genius. I made a plan.
Facts (up to this point):
- I am missing my Stats notebook which contains notes and homework that is due.
- I haven’t eaten since 6:00am in the morning. I am starving.
- I have two sandwiches in my backpack.
- The weather is hot.
- It is almost-Chicago windy (a figure of speech; I’ve never been there).
- I am wearing a sweater over a sweater.
- My car is parked on the outskirts of school because the school parking lots are full.
Reminding you readers, I am an extremely intelligent once-in-a-generation-legacy, so I made a plan. While walking to my car, I ate my red-bean sandwich. I had to protect my sandwich from flying objects. My sweater was acting as a resistant to the wind. It is damn hot. But I finally reached the car, far away from school on an elevated plain. My armpits are a swamp, but no worries.
I finally reached home, grabbed the notebook, and drove back to school. I reached my IR class promptly at 12:00pm. I finished the test 20 minutes later, which left 80 minutes for me to study Stats. I walked to the Writing Center (I’m a tutor there, and they allow me to study in the room), sat down, and took the notebook out. I opened it. Everything was fine… except the homework was missing.
I flipped through each individual page hoping my homework was stuck in one of the pages. It wasn’t. Reminding you readers, I am an extremely intelligent legacy-kid, so I made the calculations and came up with a plan… again.
Facts (up to this point… again):
- I have my notebook, but I am missing homework that is due.
- I’m hungry again.
- I have one sandwich remaining.
- It’s still hot and windy.
- I’m still wearing a sweater over a sweater.
- My car is still parked on the outskirts of school.
I decided to spare myself some unnecessary pain, so I called my sister to confirm the homework was on my desk. She didn’t pick up. I tried the house phone. Nobody picked up. Thinking two steps ahead, I left my backpack and sweater in the Writing Center. I then grabbed my sandwich and ate it once again on the way to my car. When I got home, I searched for the homework. Everything was fine, except I couldn’t find the homework.
Staying calm (this is a flat out lie), I silently [angrily] drove back to school. I changed into a t-shirt before I left the house. Along the way, my genius mind contemplated the homework being somewhere inside the Stats book. The time was 1:20pm when I finally reached the Writing Center. I checked my Stats book. Nothing was there. I then checked my notebook again. Everything was fine, because the homework was there. It was in one of the side pockets that I hadn’t bothered checking.
The tragic facts:
- I’ve drove to and fro school two extra times. The second trip was completely unnecessary.
- I’ve walked four extra times up and down the hills in the neighborhood where I parked my car, on the outskirts of school.
- What could have been 1 hour 40 minutes of additional studying became 30 measly minutes.
- I was too calm [miserable] to study anymore, so I sat there relaying my story [ranting] to a co-worker.
- I consumed two meals while speed walking. It was a new [nauseating] experience!
I’m sorry to have caused some of you to shed a few tears. Don’t worry, I feel your pain. Even geniuses make occasional mistakes. Don’t feel too sorry for me.